She Lives!

Hey Y’all!  Yup, I am here and alive and kicking.  Summer session kicked my bootie, that’s true, but I lived to tell ;)

Lessons Learned:

  • Do not take more than 1 summer class (16 weeks of work in 8 weeks is no joke, y’all).
  • You’ve waited this long to finish, no need to crazy rush through it all!

Actually didn’t take any classes this Fall semester because it is busy season at work.  I need my sanity.  Even MY Momma told me not to.   ;)

Quick Recap of what’s been going on, BULLET style:

  • pDaddy is still working out of state, but I was able to visit him for a weekend while Mama and Papa stayed to watch the girls.  That long weekend was something we absolutely needed – even if we missed the girls terribly!
  • Girls and I have all had our birthdays, so I now have a 10 year old, 8 year old and 5 year old.  All of whom ask me for a baby brother almost every single day.
  • I have really gotten into the IG community for planners.  I love that I have like minded people who share the same love (insanity) I have for all things stationery, pens, paper, stamps, crafts, etc.  I’m @bzm0mma2 on there for bullet journal / planner related pics :)  That’s all I’ve really been posting lately.  My poor personal IG. @bzm0mma,  has been so neglected.
  • My stamp collection has increased tremendously, though I haven’t used them much lately.  I think I’m more of a stamper-stamper-card maker-scrapbook-stamper, rather than a planner stamper, per se.  I mean, I like using the icons, but not really the words.  I like to practice writing so stamping words defeats that purpose.
  • I have started to collect brush pens, fountain pens, nibs, etc. and am loving teaching myself modern / faux calligraphy and brush lettering.  I love it so much, that laundry piled up out of nowhere.  OOPS!  As long as everyone has clean undies, #amIright?
  • I have started reading Dave Ramsey’s “Total Money Makeover”.  Wow.  I need to put my big girl pants on and get moving.  I would love to have NO debt, including the house!
  • I have also started reading Marie Kondo’s “the life-changing magic of tidying up”.  I haven’t finished reading it because I am afraid…so very afraid.  I think I need to tackle that AFTER the holidays.  Isn’t it crazy that I think I can tackle debt and finances more than getting rid of stuff?  I know I will feel better though and with thoughts of moving to a different state (JUST THOUGHTS) which means totally downsizing our house, I need to get on this…sooner rather than later.

Lesson Learned:

I miss blogging…stay tuned for musings and ramblings…of life happening :)

Back to School – Summer Style

I finally took a leap and went back to school this summer.  I only have an Associates degree and never finished getting my Bachelors.  I’ve had my professional position and career for almost 16 years so obviously, my employer(s) didn’t / don’t mind.  It is more for self satisfaction.  I can’t get over the fact that I don’t have this one piece of paper that says I have a Bachelors in blah-blah-blah.  Instead, I am going to stress myself out and possibly put myself in debt for said piece of paper.  This isn’t my first attempt…I attempted to go back to school in 2012, but the whole moving process derailed me and then bam!  Time flew on by and here I am, 3 years later, finally here and doing it.

I was overly ambitious at first, taking 3 classes in the summer.  Summer sessions are only 8 weeks in duration so it’s much double time.  I decided to drop one before the deadline because I realized I wouldn’t be able to spend quality time with my girls while they were off if I kept on with the 3 classes.  Just in the 2nd week now and I’m thinking maybe I should have dropped 2 and just stuck to 1!  It’s pretty intense, y’all.  Why?

I (am):


B) haven’t been to school since 2004.

C) now have 3 kids all home for the summer.

D) “single-momming” it for the most part since pDaddy took a job out of state.

E)  still working full time from home.

F) OLD (did I say that already? I’m going senile too, I guess).

G) going back to point “D”.  “single-momming” it is no joke.  I don’t know how you real single moms/miiitary wives handle it…Hubby came home for a weekend after a month and I was overcome with joy and chores for him to do!  ahahahah  Seriously though, I had to add some of his chores (mowing the lawn, etc.) to my already long list PLUS school.   I think I’m a glutton for punishment.

WHY else would I be getting all anxious and stressed?

I am OVERLY analytical by nature.  I mean, it is my profession as well (systems analyst), but throwing multiple choice questions at me has me in an anxiety ridden state.  I end up finding the “correct” answer in at least 2 of the options because I could argue both (or more) sides of said options.  I have been in a position to “think outside of the box” – to find a way to go around the problem/solution.  I have been used to questioning requirements and see if I can find loop holes and faults.  i know how to find a way to “break” something when I have to dual role as a systems analyst and tester.

pDaddy and my parents always said I should have been a lawyer, but as I’m studying Business “Legalese” this semester where in the first 3 chapters, we study different kinds of laws and courts of law, etc…I don’t know.  Even when there is a final answer, I don’t find it finite.  It’s not like Math – where 1+1 = 2 (let’s not start on Common Core now).  I mean really, I like things cut and dry.  Multiple Choice answers make me stressed out and anxious.  At least give me an “if – then” statement or condition or have a viable way to argue my answer choice instead of giving me a red X when I choose the “wrong” one.  UGH. Where’s my wine!?!?!

ANYWHHHAAAYYY…let me get off my school soapbox for a minute and just do some catching up…

I’m debating on whether or not to fully resurrect this blog or create just a whole new one entirely.  I can’t even think of a new site name or new “moniker” so I guess I’m answering my own question and sticking to this for now.

Brief run down on me…

In the past year or so, I’ve:

  • taken a liking to Zumba so I’m also trying to keep that on the schedule whilst adjusting to not having pDaddy working from home.  This means that I can’t get my Zumba on if I am inundated with work-work and/ school-work nor can I go if any of the girls are sick b/c I can’t just leave them with pDaddy anymore.  I feel my inner diva comes out when in Zumba.
  • run the best race I have in a LONG time – injury free too!  Still over 2 minutes slower than my best, but I will take slow over injury! This was also over a month ago :(  Best race in 2 years and I haven’t really run since.  pDaddy took his out of state job shortly (monday after my saturday race) after that.  I should just run in the gym on a treadmill, but that goes in line w/girls not being sick and poor Shrimpie was sick w/a fever for a full week and then almost 2 weeks after that on and off.
  • come into my own in my Bullet Journal.  It’s not the original way, but it works for me and is pretty here and there ;)
  • spent WAY too much on craft / art / stationery supplies.  I don’t even want to calculate.  Nope, not going to happen.
  • slowly been getting into “plannering” and all the inks and planner stamps that come with it.
  • not spent much in the realm of make-up/beauty products *ANGELS sing*…not that I’ve saved tho :( That spending got diverted to craft stuff mentioned above.
  • seen one of the most beautiful places in the world – El Nido, Palawan Philippines when we went to the Philippines back in February for pDaddy’s cousin’s wedding and grandma’s 90th birthday celebration/reunion. Got to also swim with sea turtles which was also pretty amazing!
  • discovered new music.  LOVE “Hot Sardines“.  No shame in my game admitting that I discovered them through the Starbucks app.  Glad the world is finally catching up to “PMJ” and I also love “Us the Duo“.  What an amazingly, talented couple AND she’s Filipina to boot ;)  Holler (wait, do all the cool kids still say that?  totally aged myself again, me thinks).
  • made new friends.
  • gained weight, lost weight, gained weight, lost weight, lather, rinse, repeat.
  • started to get comfortable in my own skin even with the weight fluctuation.  I mean, I wish I still looked like I did back in the early 2000s, but hey, I can sit here and argue, I had 3 kids since then, etc…Fact of the matter is, yes, I do have 3 kids and the last one made my stomach a luxury townhouse  building, but I wouldn’t change it for the world.

A whole slew of other things have been going on as well, but let’s stop there for now.


IMG_3859 My mind is anywhere and everywhere lately, it seems.  Being a WAHM juggling school activities, schedule, work (!!!!), mommy duties, wifey duties, house to-do’s and responsibilities does that to a person.  Though I’ve adopted the Bullet Journal way of organizing my life, I still find it hard to find time to blog.  I realized that it’s because, maybe, I never put that as an action item in my Bullet Journal.  So alas, I put it on there!

So, here I am, again…attempting to blog.  I wanted to actually get into it again with joining NaBloPoMo, but, I was sick the first weekend of November and that was that.  It’s pretty difficult to blog when all your body wants to do is get sucked in by the couch and it’s not even the most comfortable of couches.

But, I am here now and that’s all that matters.

I’m not sure where I want this blog to go anymore.  It started as an online journal type of thing documenting my girls’ lives, then went into some working out and healthy eating entries (both of which are seriously lacking in my life as of late) and even tidbits of fashion and beauty.  Like I said, my mind is everywhere.  I may keep it that way and just write whatever’s in my fancy for the day.  Do I really want to keep focus on just one topic on my blog?  Hmmm…not at the moment, but yet, I’m not sure where to go.  It’s hard to pick up where you left off when the last post was from months ago.

I stopped posting not because I didn’t want to, but more because I fell behind and the longer I fell behind, the harder it was for me to figure out where to pick up from.  So today?  I’m going to start with FOCUS (4 paragraphs later).  I really need to do that in order to get better at everything I need to do.

The way I’ve been trying to get my FOCUS On is by using the Bullet Journal and believe me, it has helped me and then some.  I always have had a planner and multiple calendars (still have a few dry erase ones for the family to see easily), but I found myself with multiple planners and post-it notes everywhere.  The Bullet Journal has changed my life and I’ve even convinced my mom and sister to get in on the action.

IMG_3853Besides the Bullet Journal, I’ve caught myself doodling like back in all my school days (elementary, high school and college – actually even work).  I’ve always felt like it was therapeutic and if not for MissZoot, I never would have known that there’s actually another term for it besides doodling…Apparently, it’s all the rage these days (maybe?  maybe not? ;) ).  The term is “zentangle” or “zendoodle” or what-have-you.  I like “zendoodle“.  It does get me into a zen state and to me, it’s still doodling.  I don’t know if there’s a definitive definition for either, but…Anyway, there are Pinterest boards galore and books and classes you can take.  I ran into this lady’s page via Pinterest and think it’s pretty darn awesome that she’s made some downloadble prints of patterns you can use in these doodles (thank Ms. Emily!).

Ahhh…Bullet Journal-ing and ZenDoodling – feeding my addiction to office supplies: pens, notebooks, papers, pretty colors of all of the above and washi tape too (that’s another one that i didn’t know had a name…I always saw it as “paper tape” or “tape ruban” or something).  And on that note, I need to shift my focus to clearing and organizing my craft area that houses all of these said supplies.

What do you do to keep your FOCUS in you line of sight?

Hello? Is this thing on?

Wow, been almost 2 months since I posted.  Once again, I need to clear the cobwebs…

I’ve just been so consumed in EVERYTHING going on w/everybody that I haven’t had time to blog.  Facebook and Instagram have been getting updated frequently, but that’s about it.  Mainly, I update Facebook b/c my relatives are mostly all on there.  Being that we moved out of NJ into the middle of the cornfields, that’s another way for everyone to keep up with one another.  But this here blog?  Well, no one in my family really knows about it.  It’s my “anonymous” place on the interwebs…that’s now full of cobwebs.

Thing is, I’m not even sure where I want to go with this blog anymore.  I started blogging years ago just to track my babies’ development in utero and out.  Then it became me wanting to get fit and my kiddie entries fell to the way side.  Then I got back into Fashion and Beauty and then getting fit again.  See what I mean?  This blog is everywhere except one focal point.

Then again, it is my blog, so I guess the focal point would be whatever I wanted to talk about, but…At least I see that my blogging has enabled a way for me to have a tool to look back on things and some things make me feel goofy and other things make me feel old (like what?  I started this blog when Razz was but a whee baby?  She’s now 5, by the way).

As always, I need to learn to make time.  I think I’m getting better with juggling family time and such, but I need to make time for this little home on the web.  I wonder if I’ll keep this blog or start a new one…

Posting from the Park

Been so crazy busy w/work (and other stuff) lately that I can’t even just add picture links to the posts in draft mode….like the finale to my Mother’s Day Surprise.  I’m glad I wrote that draft when I had a bit more time because it’s a wordy one, y’all…anyway, seems like my only “free” time to post (via phone) is now – while “watching” Beans at pre-ball practice.  I guess, technically, I’m still not “free”.

Being busy has definitely worn me out. I ran all of once in 2wks, but I can’t even call it that.  I woke up late Monday and was just able to get on the ‘mill for all of 15mins…still on week5 in couch to 5k.  I think I gave mysef an anxiety attack about running 20 mins straight for week 5 day 3 that I just stalled myself…grrr…get a grip, Steph!

I really, really need to step up this workout thing.  My midesction is still looking like I’m 7months+ pregnant, but I popped my last baby a year and 8 months ago.

Being busy has also messed up my wannabe fashionista comeback.  I’m back to jeans/shorts and a tee and sneakers (bc my toesies are in desperate need of a pedi!).  Such a shame bc I’m loving some of my new purchases that finally came – jewelry and new jeans, etc.  I did have a non-tee outfit last week, but of course, we were rushing off somewhere and hen we got home, it was back to work for me….

Hopefully things will let up soon…I’ve got some crazy big news up my sleeve ;)

On Thrifting…

BCBGirls SandalsThrifting – The art of buying(selling) used items. Said more eloquently, here’s Wikipedia’s definition:

Thrifting refers to the act of shopping at a thrift store, flea market, garage sale, or a shop of a charitable organization, usually with the intent of finding interesting items at a cheap price.

Do you shop at thrift stores? I know everyone raves at the great finds they’ve come home with and it ranges from clothes/shoes/accessories to housewares to furniture, but I haven’t been that lucky. Then again, I’ve only been to Goodwill 3 times and another local shop once (Saturday, actually).

I went to a store yesterday that mainly sold clothes, shoes and accessories (and some books). They had great selections and saw a lot that I would actually wear, but in the end, I left with a blazer, a lightweight casual jacket and a pair of shoes – that I debated forever. I don’t know if I’ll even wear the shoes…knowing someone else wore them. What if they had some kind of athelete’s foot fungus type thing going? I mean, they are beautiful BCBGirls sandals (pictured above) so I really doubt anyone would wear them w/yuckiness showing out in the open…but, what if they had stinky, sweaty feet?

See, this is why I have a hard time buying second-hand. What if they had some kind of skin rash? What if they had/have pets and the pet had fleas…??? I’m not pretentious, nor am I a hardcore germaphobe, but I guess I just care too much about the previous owner(s). Ok, I’m a little germaphobe-y, but I think it’s more of a mental outlook for me.

Last year, I bought 2 vintage designer clutch bags from eBay. Now, I’m not sure if they’re authentic, even if the seller said they were, but I loved the look of them and the prices were decent. Have I used these bags at all? Nope. Is it because I haven’t had an occasion to wear them too? Partly. The main reason is when I did have somewhere to wear them to, they had a smell to them…one wreaked of smoke and the other just had that “old” smell that I associate w/my grandmother’s closet. I’ve since aired them out and they seem fine and wearable now…BUT, another thing that bugs me besides the previous owners’ possible skin issues or hygienic routines, is the previous owner’s history.

What if the previous owner had financial issues? What if they went broke? What if they had just bad luck overall?

Maybe it’s my Filipino background and that all the superstitious, spiritual legends playback in my head where every object, animate or inanimate, have a life to them – either of their own or from their owner. I have seen many a movie / show where something like an old, antique object brings about luck, good or bad, to the new owners stemming from the old owner. If the old owner had a streak of bad luck and went broke, the new owner would inherit that spirit after taking that antique object home / owning it. So then, new owner gets bad luck too. I’ve even seen an extreme instance where a family is sickly and all die off eventually (dramatic much? Welcome to Filipino Cinema) and something of theirs was picked up by someone new and they all started to get sickly until some spiritual medium was able to tell them to get rid of that object.

Does anyone else think this way? I hope I’m not the only one that’s this kooky.

At this point, all the thrift stuff I’ve purchased have not been used – except for a pair of shorts that still had tags on them and another pair that I washed 3x prior to wearing. Even the baskets that I bought (for $0.25 each!!!) are just sitting in a plastic bag in the closet. I started to clean them w/disinfecting wipes and the color actually changed! I don’t know if it’s because it was SO dirty or because it was Clorox and some bleaching agent could be on those wipes (I don’t know, I never checked). Which brings me to my next point…

What is the post-thrift shopping protocol? How many times should you wash the items before wearing? How many times do you get it dry cleaned? How many times do you wash an item (housewares) or wipe it down (like the baskets)? How many times do you spray disinfectant on shoes or accessories prior to using them?

I love the idea of thrifting and the possibility of saving so much money, but I don’t know how to get over my aversions. Someone needs to help me because look, these are pretty decent finds. I kind of think I paid too much for them (I picture them cheaper if at Goodwill, but Goodwill probably wouldn’t have the same selections), but still not full price. Help me here…aren’t these great finds?

Leopard lined blazer:
Leopard lined blazer

Lightweight Outdoorsy Jacket:
Lightweight jacket

What Else Can I Do?

It seems like every other week (if we’re lucky), one of the girls gets sick and then it just gets passed onto the next. Yesterday, Shrimp gets a fever out of nowhere (again). Last week? Beans had a bit of a cough, but we actually managed to keep it to just her. The week before that? Shrimp had the hives and fever. By the time all is said and done, this household is “sick free” for about 3 days until the cycle starts itself again. I’ve stocked up on Lysol and Clorox wipes. We also invested in an air purifier (yesterday). Let’s hope that lessens the germiness, shall we? I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired…

/end rant